"I recall hearing gently softly-spoken words."

I cannot recall getting sick with pneumonia, the 911 response, emergency room visit, seven days in the Medical Intensive Care Unit at a major University, nor nine days of that time not being in the 'physical world'.

The 'journey' seemed to last for days, but perhaps it was only minutes or hours. I found myself going through a tunnel, almost floating or swimming through this tunnel. I found myself in a dark space, yet there were bright primary colors seeming to form letters that I cannot recall. This space felt 'hard,' like work. I felt tired. It seemed chaotic and loud. The space was unpleasant and I remember disliking it. I then slipped through what seemed like the same tunnel and I arrived in a tunnel-like space with a soft white and somewhat golden or shimmering light. As I was moved toward the light, I was not aware of my physical body. I recall a tremendous feeling of peace, calm, quiet, beauty, and a simply 'letting go' of 'tension' for lack of a better word. I remember thinking that I preferred this space over the chaotic space. I was happy. I was moving, without any effort on my part, toward the soft glow. I continued feeling the most incredible peace, accompanied by a gentleness and softness. I recall feeling eager to reach the light. yet did not feel rushed. I was getting closer.

I then noticed a very soft, yet worn-looking, flow and fold of a light blue and gold robe. I could only see the legs of the person wearing the robe. I knew He was God. I wanted to see His face as I moved closer, but I did not. During my travel toward the light, I recall hearing gently softly-spoken words. I somehow knew that I needed to remember the words. I recall feeling slight frustration that I was having difficulty remembering the words, but after a while, I had 'memorized' them and recall feeling relieved. The words I was told to memorize were: 'Seek not to understand so that you may believe, but seek to believe so that you may understand.' I then felt myself being pulled back and away from the light. I did not want to go and recall feeling sad. I tried to fight being pulling back. Yet, I continued moving backward.

I somehow found myself turned away from the light and knew that I had to quickly take one last look back; it felt so important, and I knew there was not much time. I quickly turned my head over my shoulder and saw the soft glow and flowing 'robe' one last time. And there, walking into the light was my beloved soulmate; my precious little teacup poodle Coco. He had passed about a year before this experience, and I have missed him terribly. I only saw his back end as he entered the soft light. I remember smiling to myself, feeling tremendous relief that I saw him and that he was o.k.

I was and am still happy that I remembered the words, yet I am confused. I did some research later and learned that these words were from the poet Pablo. I had NEVER heard these words NOR did I know anything about Pablo. Truly. I have gone over and over in my mind to try to remember hearing these words prior to this experience, but I believe they were new to me. Yet, as I think about it now, I was learning about so many different faiths before this experience, trying to understand, and trying to believe. The words simply told me to BELIEVE. I find that comforting.

I heard another message when I was close to the soft light, 'There is something important you must do.' It seems I heard this over and over. I have no idea what the 'important' thing is at present but am trying to BELIEVE that it will be shown to me. I feel transformed. Things just don't seem to be that important here on Earth. I'm calmer. I'm not trying to 'figure it all out'. I'm just taking one day at a time. I miss that 'oh so comforting' peace I felt on my journey; and, frankly, I am sad about being pulled back. However, I now believe there is a place to which I'll return one day, and that brings a smile to my face. 

NDERF.org, #7839