Psychologist Kenneth Ring writes: “For the past ten years I
have been teaching a course on the near-death experience (NDE) at my university.
Every semester, thirty-five to forty young undergraduates arrive at my
classroom on the first day of the new term, usually somewhat nervous about
taking such an offbeat course but generally enthusiastic and curious about the
topic that has already excited their interest.
Ring invited Laurelynn Glass Martin to share her NDE with
his class. “Laurelynn, who is now in her thirties, began by explaining how her
life changed when she was a senior in college. She had gone into the hospital
to have what was supposed to be a routine twenty-minute laparoscopic surgical
procedure. However, her physician, as she learned later, exerted undue force
making the initial incision, puncturing her abdominal aorta, her right iliac
artery, the inferior vena cava, and her bowel in two places, ultimately hitting
her vertebral spine. As a result, Laurelynn lost almost 60 percent of her
blood—and her pulse and, obviously, nearly her life.
Without any warning, Laurelynn recalls, she suddenly found herself floating above her physical body, off to
the right side, observing with detachment, the efforts of the medical team to
revive her lifeless form.
The surgical
team was frantic. Red was everywhere, splattered on their gowns, splattered on
the floor, and a bright pool of flowing red blood, in the now-wide-open
abdominal cavity. I couldn’t understand what was going on down there. I didn’t
even make the connection, at that moment, that the body being worked on was my
own. It didn’t matter anyway. I was in a state of freedom, having a great time.
I then
traveled to another realm of total and absolute peace. There was no pain, but
instead a sense of well being, in a warm, dark, soft space. I was enveloped by
total bliss in an atmosphere of unconditional love and acceptance. The darkness
was beautiful, stretching on and on. The freedom of total peace was intensified
beyond any ecstatic feeling ever felt here on earth. In the distance, I saw a
horizon of whitish-yellowish light. I find it very difficult to describe where
I was, because the words we know here in this plane just aren’t adequate
enough.
I was admiring
the beauty of the light but never got any closer because next I felt a presence
approaching from my right, upper side. I was feeling even more peaceful and
happy, especially when I discovered it was my thirty-year-old brother-in-law
who had died seven months earlier. Although I couldn’t see with my eyes or hear
with my ears, I instinctively knew it was him.
He didn’t have
a physical form, but a presence. I could feel, hear, and see his smile,
laughter, and sense of humor. It was as if I had come home, and my
brother-in-law was there to greet me. I instantly thought how glad I was to be
with him because now I could make up for the last time I had seen him before
his death. I felt bad about not taking the time out of my busy schedule to have
a heart-to-heart talk with him when he had asked me to. I felt no remorse now,
but total acceptance and love from him about my actions.
“Reflecting on her behavior toward her brother-in-law seems
to lead Laurelynn back further into her life and, before she knows it, events
from her childhood begin to appear to her, all at once, yet in chronological
order. In one, she says: I had teased a
little girl my own age (five years old) to the point of tears. I was now in a
unique position to feel what that little girl had felt. Her frustration, her
tears, and her feeling of separateness were now my feelings. I felt a
tremendous amount of compassion for this child. I hadn’t realized that by
hurting another, I was really just hurting myself.
Other thoughts
were conveyed to me, and I remember thinking, ‘Wow; now I get it. Everything
about our existence makes sense.’ I finally got around to questioning my
brother-in-law (not with words but more [like] transference) about what was
happening and asked him if I could stay. He told me it wasn’t my time yet, that
there had been a mistake, and that I had to go back. I remember thinking,
‘Okay, I’ll go back, but I know how I can get back up here.’
At the same
instant, his thoughts were mine, saying: ‘You can’t take your own life (suicide).
That isn’t the answer, that won’t do it. You have to live your life’s purpose.’
I understood, but I still remember thinking, I don’t want to go back, and his
thought came to me, saying, ‘It’s okay; we’re not going anywhere. We’ll be here
for you again.’ The last thought of his was ‘Tell your sister I’m fine.’
I felt myself
going back, dropping downward through darkness. I didn’t feel that I had a
choice and was slammed into my body. I couldn’t believe I was returning to such
a hellish environment, but then the beauty of the experience flooded back to
me, giving me the most serene peace and calm I could hope for under the
circumstances.
After the NDE,
value changes came. I felt that the materialism and external stuff that was a
big focus before just didn’t matter anymore. My priorities in life took a
complete turnaround. I felt there was a purpose for my life, even down to the
smallest detail of being kind to others spontaneously and freely, loving more
deeply, [and] being nonjudgmental and accepting of one’s self and others. I
also got a strong message about the importance of always seeking knowledge. I
no longer fear death and, in fact, will welcome it when it is the right
time—and that’s only for the universal, supreme power to decide. Until then, though,
I try to enjoy each day like it’s my last and live more consciously in the
moment.”
Kenneth
Ring and Evelyn Elsaesser Valarino, Lessons
from the Light: What We Can Learn from the Near-Death Experience (Insight
Books, 1998; Moment Point Press, 2006), 27-32.