Thursday, September 30, 2021

I've done "what I was told to do in the light"

It was a beautiful sunny summer day when I was at our family's wood cabin in northern Michigan. We went there every summer and spent a week. In front of the cabin was a river. The water was perfectly clear. I could not swim at the time. I was wading out in the water and the water was at chest height. I was looking at the sky and listening to nature and I took another step out and found there was no bottom and I went under the water and the river started to move me to the right.

The last thing I remember thinking and seeing in my body, was that I could see so far under water and that the water was so clear. The next thing I remember was I came into this clear white light. As soon as I came into this light, all my fear of drowning was gone and I felt this light envelop me. This clear white light was all around me that I could see. I didn't look behind me but I know it was behind me too. I felt this total love and acceptance of me and I felt the same with the light. I knew I was part of this light; I belonged to this light. I was home. I then realized there was a presence in this light and I realized I was light, too.

We were the same but with different personalities. I couldn't see anybody for myself or a body in the light. The light then told me ‘you are here to learn how to love and to gain knowledge’. When I was told this, all the implications of the word love and knowledge were imparted to me. With the word 'love', it wasn't just about physical love but the love of nature, accepting all people as the same, everything that pertained to love. The same was with knowledge. It wasn't just about book knowledge but about learning about different cultures, histories of the world. I felt when I was told this that it wasn't just my reason for being on earth but all of our reason for being here: mankind.

When I look back over my life I can see I have been doing exactly what I was told to do in the light that day. My life has been all about learning and since I have been on the net, I have made many friends all over the world. There was no time there. I don't know if I was only there for seconds, minutes or what. I knew my body was safe when I came into the light. I knew I was going back to my body. I don't remember leaving the light. I don't remember getting back into my body. That has all been blocked.

Since I am here all I can guess is that I came to a shallow place and was able to get my feet under me and stand up and get out of the river. I had a hell of a time learning how to swim the next year in school. It took me quite some time to float on my stomach with my face in the water. #7375

Wednesday, September 29, 2021

Intervention by angel-like beings

In 1984 as a bus was about to run me down. I was in front of the left headlight and felt the bus come in contact with me. I was lifted up and then backwards and landed many yards away from the bus on the sidewalk. The moment the headlight was in front of me I was quickly taken to a place away from the bus, there were several angel-like beings there and I was frantically telling them that I have a young daughter to care for. After that I remember being many yards away from the bus frantically picking up my belongings. I have always thought that this was an intervention. The witness told me that he had never seen a person lifted up and backwards, he was amazed as was I. I felt lucky to be alive! #2374 

Monday, September 27, 2021

True Home and True Self Revealed in Explosion

 The Third of May, 1969
"B" Co., 2nd Bn/47' Inf (Mech.), 9' Inf Div.

It was toward the end of the dry season, and my platoon was pulling out. Our mission was simple: drive down the road, show the flag, and make sure that we still had the right-of-way. The two slowly moving tracks (armored personnel carriers) in front of mine were already kicking up the pulverized dirt road into little clouds of dust. Lady, the platoon mascot, trotted alongside wagging her tall. She no longer went with us ever since a mine had blown up the track that she had been riding on, I exchanged my cloth hat for a helmet, put on my wire-rimmed sunglasses, and half-cocked the .50 caliber machine gun as we passed through the base camp gate and picked up speed. Lady stopped a few feet beyond the gate and watched us go.

Our four tracks soon achieved a monotonous but comfortable 40 m.p.h. which created a welcome breeze. To either side of the road for mile after mile lay a grid work of rice-paddy dikes dividing the land into tidy rectangles of various sizes. The pale yellow stubble of last season's crop failed to hide the earth in the fields. Separated by cracks an inch wide, the clay soil of the paddies had dried into flagstone-sized blocks. Although the land was flat, the fields did not extend far into the distance, but rather ended abruptly at the ubiquitous wood line.

This woods was composed of thick, lush, green nipa-palm and stood from twenty to thirty feet tall. From no place in the Mekong River Delta could one escape from being completely surrounded by it, Sometimes it might be a couple of miles away, and at others only a few hundred feet. It grew where the delta tributaries were, and they, like a root system were everywhere, "We" controlled the larger towns and villages, the roads, the skies, the major waterways, and the rice paddies. The wood line belonged to "Charlie."

With diesel engines roaring and trailing a huge, mile-long cloud of dust, the column began to approach one of the spots where the dreaded jungle wall squeezed in on the road from both sides. Instinctively, I began to watch the wood line more closely. All of a sudden, a very large anti-tank mine was command-detonated eight feet directly beneath my lil' ol' lilly-white *ss. I immediately knew what was happening (because my track had been blown up before just three weeks prior to this), and thought to myself, "Oh sh*t, here we go again." I was catapulted upwards along with everyone and everything else. People, dust, weapons, ammunition, helmets, and C-ration boxes formed an expanding inverted cone with myself in the middle.

On the journey upward, external time decelerated. The rates of the rotations of all of the objects surrounding me rapidly decreased-in an apparent violation of the law of conservation of angular momentum. I was fascinated by the unnatural ever-slowing gyrations of the bodies of my comrades and wondered, "Is this the end? Are we all dead?" At the apex of my trajectory, time stopped completely and an inexplicable calm descended. The state of consciousness that then prevailed was as to the normal waking state as the normal waking state is to a dream. Whatever It was, It was peaceful, omnipresent (temporally and spatially), omniscient, and absorbed everything into an indivisible Whole.

The entire universe past, present, and future collapsed down to a single Center upon which everything depends for its existence. It is That which does not change. It is the "Light" of Pure Consciousness which illuminates all things. It is the ultimate meaning of the enigmatic Biblical passage, "The light of the body is the eye: if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light" (Matt. 6:22). It is the great Nothing-for it includes all things, and therefore, is Itself not a thing. That's how It gets to be the All-in-All.

Furthermore, there was (and still is) absolutely no doubt as to Its authenticity anymore than one would doubt upon awakening from a dream that the waking state is "real" and that the dream was "just a dream." In short, God Himself took over my reins in the sense that "I" no longer existed as a distinct entity-only He exists, There was an overwhelming feeling of bliss, love, compassion, and strangely enough a dazzling sense of déjà vu. The knowledge obtained that the True Home and the True Self of all things had been miraculously revealed.

The events of my life up to that point were unhurriedly and nonjudgmentally reviewed in great detail-not in chronological order, but somehow all at once-although some events were emphasized more intensely than others. Subsequently, "I" was allowed to exist again (there was no choice in the matter-it simply happened) and was given the opportunity to be aware of anything that I wanted to be aware of with the understanding that time was not a factor; indeed, there was "all the time in the world." I proceeded to focus on this or that aspect of my life and concluded that there wasn't too much to be ashamed of Actually, I made extremely poor use of this gift, but then, I was just a naive 22-year-old with a somewhat skewed concept of relative importance.

I could "see" a 360 degree panorama of the road, the wood lines on either side, and the other three tracks of my platoon (two in front and one behind us), The entire episode seemed to be housed in my head, but I was uncertain whether or not my head was still attached to the rest of my body-although, under the circumstances, this point did not seem important one way or the other. In other words, I really didn't care if my life was to be snuffed out or not within the next few seconds. I was then gently (but unequivocally) "informed" that I would survive the explosion without serious injury and even that I would make it out of Vietnam in one piece. So, selfishly, I turned my attention to the immediate situation and very calmly and deliberately concluded that I should: 1) stay conscious so as not to drown in two inches of rice-paddy water, 2) stay loose so as to break as few bones as possible, and 3) roll away from the track so that it wouldn't crush me to death if it tipped over. Only after my mind had run out of things to decide on did time start to rush back in. The transcendental state of consciousness terminated and I reverted back to the normal waking state. I could see the ground about 20 feet below me and began to fall towards it.

I was left with an intense feeling of awe and well-being. Ever since, I have been convinced with a conviction that precedes even my conviction that two plus two equals four. That God IS for me. It is no longer a matter of faith or belief, but rather, one of knowing for sure because I have seen Him as He is. However, it was a pleasant surprise to discover that He is loving, compassionate, and forgiving-properties which I had not previously made adequate allowances for. I will always be thankful to Him for reaching down and picking me up in the palm of His hand so to speak at that particular instant; in fact, it still brings tears of gratitude to my eyes even as I write this thirty years later. Also, I no longer fear death (pain and suffering yes, but not death itself)- because, by His Grace, this particular raindrop remembers the ocean from which it comes. Unfortunately, the experience of this state is up to God not down to us, but take my word-for-word for it, It is always Here and Now and a lot closer than you think.

I have never experienced anything (before or since) which came anywhere near close to being as real and as profound as the state of consciousness which I have feebly attempted to describe. However, my remembrance of it has sufficed to console and comfort me through the vicissitudes of life-especially through the hard times. Sorry, I have not noticed any paranormal or psychic or supernatural abilities with respect to myself-just an unshakable conviction in the reality of something spiritual. If you ever run across a sure-fire method for reawakening this state within me (without blowing me up or telling me to meditate on OM for thirty years), please let know. May God go with you (He will anyway, but it's a nice thought).

Friday, September 24, 2021

Out of body watching her baby being born

While pregnant with my second child, I could feel something strange going on with my heart. It was identified as an arrhythmia. This was just a couple weeks before I got induced for high blood pressure. After I got checked in to be induced, the nurse was trying to place my IV. I normally have a pretty high pain tolerance, but she kept pushing the needle down into my arm because the "catheter was stuck." I put that in quotations because I have no idea what that means. I felt myself get light headed, told the nurse I was going to pass out, and then I did pass out.

My step mom has a sister who works on the labor and delivery floor.

While passed out, I was in the hall, slightly elevated, looking into my hospital room. I also was able to see my step mom’s sister trying to peek in to see what was happening.

After I came to, my baby’s heart beat was lost for 12 minutes.

A couple days later, I told my husband the story, and he said everything I saw looking into the room was accurate. I told my step mom the story, and she said her sister was trying to peek into the room. #9228

Thursday, September 23, 2021

Learns her future during her NDE

It was my birthday and my parents let me have a small party. One of my girlfriends was staying the night. My parents went out to dinner and I decided that I was a teenager and wanted to try drinking alcohol like my father did. I filled up a tall glass with Gin held my nose and consumed all of it. The equivalent of at least fifteen shots of straight alcohol.

I quickly became disoriented and then fell unconscious. My sister and my friend put me in my bed and when my parents came home and went in to check on me my mother noticed I wouldn't wake up. At this point, they told me they tried to carry me to the car. My father was so mad, he wouldn't help and I was at this point dead-weight. This is the point when I remember lifting out of my body and floating mid-air over my body, which was lying in the dining room floor. I left my body. I was no longer intoxicated; I was completely clear and could see everything at once. I realized that I was almost dead and became very upset and began to cry for Jesus to help me.

At this moment, I was aware of a light enveloping me. I was the light and it was me. There was another Being with me. The Being let me know that I was going to die and I must leave this body for good. I remember arguing with the Being explaining that I didn't want to because it was so hard going through the childhood years and I didn't want to have to go through this again. The Being indicated that my body was severely damaged and I couldn't go back. I became very adamant at this point that God was all powerful and could fix the body. At some point, the decision was made to let me re-enter my body on my faith or will, whatever one may call it.

The next phase was like an evaluation. I was taken back through my past, beginning with my birth and we went over what had already happened. Then I was shown an overview of key points in my life that was to come. One of these key experiences was that I would have a child at a very early age and it would be a boy. It was explained to me that from this point forward I would do everything earlier than most, including my older sister. I would marry first, bear children first and generally have more responsibility than my sisters and other friends and family members. I was told that I would soon leave my church and have a short period of rebellion and drug experimentation but this would end fairly soon and I would begin to climb out of it. I was told that I was going to be a writer and that my words would touch many people. I was instructed to write a book on or around the age of forty and that after I had fulfilled my life plans I would eventually die before my two sisters.

All of a sudden... I opened my eyes and I was in a hospital bed in the intensive care unit. The preacher from my church was there praying for me. I actually thought at this point that I had died when I saw him there with my mother who was crying. I gradually woke up and asked what had happened? My mother said I had been in a coma for three days and I had almost died. # 2283 

Wednesday, September 22, 2021

During NDE sees deceased relatives

I died during brain surgery. I went out of my body. Saw the doctors around working on me during surgery. I went through a tunnel really fast. I was in a wonderful light. I saw a bridge. Across the bridge were people I knew who had died, like my father who had died less than a year before this. He was so happy to see me and said, 'Hi Mija.' There was light around them. Other family members were all smiling at me. He was so proud for them to see me. I was happy to be there. Then after a while, a voice said I had to go back. It wasn't my time. I had things to do. My dad's face dropped. He looked sad. I said I didn't want to go back. I was crying. Then like an instant. I went back through the tunnel and I was back in my body. #2328 

Tuesday, September 21, 2021

In NDE learns Jesus had a NDE

I was a pedestrian pushing a disabled car when it was struck from behind. I was between the cars and the impact was so great it bent the frames on both cars. I regained consciousness on a gurney in the emergency room. I knew I was going to die and welcomed the release from pain. Because of my religious upbringing (Southern Baptist) I was expecting a man in white robes on a golden throne to greet me. As I died, there was a cessation of all feeling and blackness closed in and light shrank to a pinpoint. I felt myself falling backwards into the blackness and a cool sensation of wind. I felt myself turn and then a pinpoint of light appeared in the blackness. I came out into the light and was in an upper corner of the emergency room looking down at my body on the gurney. I was not disturbed by being dead or by seeing my body on the gurney. I was in a state of euphoria and a sense of perfect peace and being. I had no pain, wants, or needs of any kind. I had a sense of being home. I sensed a presence behind me and then had a communication. This was beyond telepathy. This was not hearing words in my mind and translating them into thoughts, this was knowing as the other presence knew, an instant sharing of knowledge. I had no interest in asking questions or in seeing anything, I was completely at peace. I understood that I was to return. At this point, I had my first want, the desire to remain. I wanted to know why I was to return.

The wall beyond my gurney became transparent and I was shown what appeared to be a flowing river. It was silver and shimmering as it flowed. The drops in the river were each a different color yet all flowed together as one body of water. Nothing gave me the impression this was actually water or a river but this is the best descriptive example that can be given of something I witnessed for which there are no words. The main body of the flow was silvery shimmering lights with different colored drops on the flow. I understood (I use this term because I did not actually hear) the colored drops were the experiences of all who had lived. The experiences existed as separate items yet belonged to the whole. The whole was the collective knowledge of all. I understood there was no individual, just one, yet each experience was an individual making up the whole. This concept of ONE is so foreign to any description I can give, there seems to be no way now of describing it. My previous understanding of ONE was a single uniqueness. In this case, ONE is something else. Many being ONE and ONE being many, both existing simultaneously in the same time and space.

I further understood that the collective experiences are omniscient knowledge. Everything that has been spoken, heard, and experienced. These colored drops contained each experience down to the memory of every cell division, every thought. All experiences were known at once by the collective consciousness that was the stream. Any experience could be known as if it were a first person experience happening at the time it happened originally. It was then that I was made to understand why there was no man on a golden throne to pass judgment on me. I had the first-person experience of the one called 'Jesus.' I had his entire life (remember, time does not exist). His name was not Jesus, something more like Josephus. He had a regular mom and dad, no God intervention. He had a difficult birth and an NDE during birth. He had a difficult childhood because of his near death experience, he knew too much. As he got older he began to tell people about his experience. He told people not to fear death because they would live forever. He told people that after death there was perfect peace and a perfect state of love. He told people that everyone was exactly the same and everyone could know who they really were and awaken to their spiritual self. He drew a small crowd of followers. After a time some of his followers wanted to form a religion and replace the Jewish priests because of the money and power. He cast the power mongers out of his following. Five of them conspired against him. At his trial there were three witnesses against him, all were his followers. He was hanged (not crucified, he was just a petty criminal to the Romans). Being in a hurry the Romans cut him down a little early and his loyal followers carried his body off. He revived having had a second near death experience (his 'second coming' so to speak). He lived for a while hiding from his five traitorous former friends (the anti-Christ?) but died after a bit from his injuries.

There was no fear, or joy from this stream. I use the term river of life to describe the stream. There was an understanding of complete peace, happiness, and contentment without need or want, coming from the river of life. I had a strong desire now to join the river of life and felt this was home, where I came from. Touching the river gave me insight into realms beyond realms, universes beyond universes, dimensions beyond dimensions; I experienced infinity. I was shown a long line of experiences in other realms of realities and on other worlds. It was some time later I realized it was my past 'lives' review of all existences of which I had been part. There were beings and objects unlike anything I had ever seen or heard of, even in the imaginings of science fiction writers I had read. I was made to know there were an infinite number of realms of existence and all were part of the One, the Source. The stream had distinct layers or levels that were not divided by any kind of barrier but each seemed to be of a different density. The one I experienced was the highest level. Where I first came after death was into the lowest level; I call it the 'between place' or 'lowest level of transition.'

That stream of consciousness and knowledge is what might be termed the 'mind of God'. I understood I was not to join the river of life at that time, I was to go back. At this understanding, I began to have fears and questions. I again reiterated I did not want to go. I understood I was to go back. I then was made to understand there would be great pain. I did not want to face the pain that awaited me. I understood the pain would be great and it would change and mold me. I wanted to know why and what I was to do. I was flushed with two sensations, one after the other. One sensation was of a sense of an action being right that brought a brief moment of the total peace and comfort I had experienced. The other sensation was one of an action being wrong. The sensation for wrong was a darkening of the light and cold. At that point, the light dimmed and I felt myself falling backwards into blackness. There was a cool wind and I felt myself turning. There was a pinpoint of light in the blackness and I reemerged into light on the gurney and in my body. I was mostly unconscious for the next thirty hours and underwent surgery. I understood from family members I died again but I did not have another experience. #2543

Monday, September 20, 2021

Unconscious burn patient recalls everything

In the Netherlands, where I was working as a plumber, I fell ten meters (thirty feet) from a rooftop. On the street below, I struck a cauldron of tar. A wave of hot tar spilled out over me. Lying there on the street, I was conscious and felt no pain but very warm. 

I cannot remember the ride to the hospital. At the hospital, the doctors started working on me right away. Because they thought I was in tremendous pain, they gave me a shot of morphine. I remember quite well that they called the hospital in Beverwijk, specialized in burn treatment, asking for advice. Doctor Hermans sent an assistant with a quantity of wrappings and Flamazine (ointment used to treat burns, ed.)

Lying at the first-aid station, I had the first out-of-body experience. I saw myself lying on the table and heard the nervous yelling of the doctors and assistants. What I said earlier about the morphine, because they thought I was in tremendous pain - I wasn't, because I was not in my body.

They were wrapping up me in a sort of net, like a sausage, when Doctor Hermans' assistant entered. He got very upset and told the others to unwrap me. They were also trying to take off my Tee-shirt, but because it was stuck to my skin with the tar, they also tore my skin. After I was treated as best as possible, they brought me into intensive care. They brought me in a glass-encased sterile room and put me to bed.

The first week after the accident, they injected me literally full of morphine, to keep me in a sort of coma. Afterwards a doctor and my parents told me that I had not been conscious for one moment during that week. The funny part is that I can remember everything that happened at the intensive care. I know my parents came to visit, that my father had to throw up when he saw me, that my mother did not know what to do and could not stop crying. 

Also a nurse came to sit by me whenever she could manage the time. I knew she was taking courses in surgery assistance. I saw her and her colleagues working the whole week, with me and other intensive care patients. One given moment, I knew precisely what patient was given which medication and what time.

When I still had not died after one week, I was given penicillin. Because of the lack of morphine, I suffered withdrawal symptoms. I slowly regained consciousness and that is when the pain also started.

When I told the nurse, what she was studying for and how far she had progressed, she was incredulous. Afterwards I never saw her again; she avoided me as if I were some sort of pariah. Another nurse I told of the medication patients were getting and she also reacted very strangely. After this, I did not mention it again.

Five weeks later, I was released from hospital. I spent three months at home to heal from the burns and the concussion. I did not have any more out-of-body experiences afterwards. #2819

Sunday, September 19, 2021

"The person I was before the experience is gone."

I had a heart attack due to an untreated heart condition known as Wolfe Parkinson White Syndrome. After leaving my body I was pulled into a void or darkness. In the distance, I saw a white ball of light come close and closer to me. I couldn't really make out what it was until I got closer. I could tell it was a human form. Finally, I realized who it was. It was a deceased friend of mine who had committed suicide the previous year. I was very close to this person in life, we went to High School together and he was a support to me in life as well as in death. He told me that I needed to return there was a strong sense of needing to return. When I asked why he told me my life had a meaning and a purpose. It wasn't my time yet. I did return. 
Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience?  
Yes I realized that life is too short to worry about things. I have more compassion now, I don't feel afraid of death. Life is a precious gift. The person I was before the experience is gone. #124


Saturday, September 18, 2021

Child vividly remembers near-death experience

I was two years old and fell into a creek. I remember seeing a bright light, cone shaped, that was pulling me upward and a woman standing at the top of the tunnel of light, she was dressed in white. I looked down and could see my body floating face down in the water. I had on brown pants, white shoes, and an over-shirt. I thought about this many times but never mentioned it until I read about a NDE in a magazine. I had always known about my near drowning, but none of the details. I questioned my mother about it, and she confirmed that she had thought that I was dead when she got me out of the water. I have never been afraid of dying, because of the extreme peace and calm that I associate with the experience. I realize that I was so very young, but the event is as real as if it happened yesterday. The woman seemed to draw me back to her, and then she just faded into a cloud-like atmosphere. #7


Friday, September 17, 2021

NDE review of this life and past lives

After a craniotomy, my body clinically hovered between life and death for two days, and my spirit left it at that time. I looked down at my body, and although it wasn't a pretty sight I was not concerned. I perceived it to be a vehicle, which carried me through the Earth school. I was in a place of love, kindness, compassion, contentment, acceptance and joy - a place of 'knowing'. I perceived myself and other beings as masses of energy, all connected and yet separate. There were no body forms or communication, as I know it in human form. There was simply a sense of all knowing. 

Each and every spirit being was supportive of each other, and I 'knew' them, although they didn't have the same forms as when I knew them on the Earth school. There were no limitations such as space or time in the spirit world. I was aware of the big picture regarding the past, present and future. I was aware that the Earth school experience was one part of my evolution. There was a review of my life in this body, and also my past lives. I was the judge as to the benefit and value of each experience. They all seemed very interconnected, and yet separate. There was a focus to each life experience, and all the experiences contributed to an end result. I didn't want to come back to the Earth school, and after some deliberation with the other beings of energy, including the God being, or large mass of energy, we decided that coming back would serve the greater good. 

I had a choice, and yet the choice seemed to be made in unity with the other beings. I also knew that if I didn't come back at this time, in this body, I would return to the Earth school in another body, to finish what I was here to do. Before the experience, I didn't believe or disbelieve in reincarnation. Now I am sure that I have had many reincarnations. When I came back into my body, I was content. It felt like my spirit was cuddling back into a warm comfortable place. At that time, my body clinically stabilized. First, I was not expected to live. When I did live my family and I were told that I would never function 'normally' again.

I don't function 'normally' according to conventional wisdom! I have lived life as an observant adventurer, and although I have always been on a path of discovery, the out of body experience intensified and reinforced all of my beliefs prior to the experience. It opened up more channels in the heart and mind, as with a radio. If we leave it on the same channel all the time, we will probably hear the same type of music, and the same slant on newscasts all the time. If we change the channel occasionally, we may hear something different. #3637

Thursday, September 16, 2021

Too little anesthesia, then too much

In the middle of my surgery I woke up, looked at the doctor and told him that what he was doing hurt. He told me they would be done shortly and then realized I had woken from anesthesia, I remember they were talking about golf. He started ordering more anesthesia then I remember hearing my heart monitor beeping. The nurses started saying they were losing me and asking me to stay with them then 'beep, beep, beeeeepp'.

Next thing I knew, I was standing over the doctor watching them work on me, I wasn't scared I was fascinated. I could see everyone. I knew they were working on me, they seemed extremely hurried, and I remember it amused me because I was no longer in pain. I remember being pulled backwards and when I turned I was in an earthy tunnel and a door was before me that opened into a spectacular light. The light was brilliant, but it did not hurt! As I passed into it, it glowed with warmth, love, knowledge, and understanding. Not just my own knowledge but knowledge of everything. I had complete understanding, collective but separate. Everything made sense. Everything was more vivid, the colors were brighter and deeper, everything was tranquil and at peace the moment I crossed into the light.

I was now standing in a lush rolling meadow, covered with blooms and trees. I felt a presence strong and even more wonderful; I knew my family was with me. The presence had a deep resonating voice that touched the core of your soul. I don't remember what the voice told me, but the peace and calm seemed to magnify. I remember sitting in the meadow, I was cradling something in my arms, asking to cross a small free flowing stream, and not being allowed, I asked to stay. I did not want to go back. I knew the peace, warmth and light could not follow me back. I tried to walk toward the stream, but then I was being pulled down and backwards through the door. I remember leaving the warm glow of the light and being filled with immense sadness as all of the knowledge and peace left me, my senses dimmed, and my vision seemed muddied compared to the brilliant vibrancy of the meadow. I was angry, mad. I felt the air being knocked out of me as I hit my body and the pain returned.

I remember the nurse saying she's back, and I started sobbing telling them I didn't want to come back, begging for them to send me back to the light. The nurse just kept saying stay with us. Don't close your eyes just stay with us, and she was holding my hand. When I think about it I am filled with an extreme since of grief and loss but I know that I will be returning someday and then they will let me cross the stream. # 3745

Wednesday, September 15, 2021

Released from fear when says, "God help me."

When I started having my heart attack, as I was lying in the floor unable to move, I was afraid because I knew I was dying and there wasn't a thing I could do about it. I won't bore you with the ride to the hospital and the treatments I received suffice to say I was overcome by the black veil of death. How ironic that's exactly what it is. After I realized I was on the other side and my fear subsided a little.

I realized that I had made a painless transition because you no longer feel the weight or trappings of your body. I was in total darkness that had put my panic emotion in overdrive. As I slowly began to acclimatize myself to my surroundings, I could feel evil slithering and crawling in the darkness all around me. I had only one thought going on inside me that being that they are looking for me! I was terrified and started looking for the light I thought was supposed to be here. I moved around as slowly and silently as possible looking for the light. I noticed it was lighter in one direction and started to move that way when I felt extreme aggression emanating from the right of me. Fearful of moving towards the light and highlighting myself with the light I instead withdrew into the darker shadow and stayed still. As I lay there listening to the scuttling and scurrying of all the evil feelings in the darkness around me I tried to figure out what to do next.

I knew if I moved from the amount of activity that was going on around me, that I would be discovered. I was at my wits end when I said, 'God help me.' Instantly everything around me went scurrying off in every direction and that was when I felt it. It is a feeling of Perfect love and trust. A feeling so strong that it could be felt so far away that traveling at supersonic speeds it would take half an hour to get there. The closer it came the stronger the feeling became until this immense feeling totally engulfed me in ecstasy so intense as to be unimaginable (for lack of better words) and lifted me by my elbows above the darkness and away we went; me being supported by two beings that felt better than a mother's breast to a newborn. I looked up at my benefactors and found that they were dressed in black gowns and had a screen over their faces that, if you looked closely, had a mirror like substance that reflected your own image back at you. They were giving me reassurances through feelings and music that was like talking, only better than language. There is nothing to learn you can understand totally. They stopped before something I couldn't make out what as it seemed that when I looked past them everything was out of focus.

One of them opened up what was as if a giant tobacco sack made of suede leather it was so soft. As she opened it, we all went inside and the sack closed over us. They then told me an immense amount of information in a gleaming. The gist of which is that this was my world and I controlled it and everything in it, I could bring anything I wanted into my world, no limits. It was mine to do with as I wished. The only rule was that if I removed something it could never come back. They then instructed me to picture in my mind a place that I felt safe. I did, and it developed right before my eyes. They then asked me if anything was wrong and I saw a couple of things that were and they instantly transformed, sort of like mercury rearranging, until they were perfect then they left. I started to explore my new world from the comfort of my oversized recliner and was really relaxing when suddenly they told me I had to go back to the other world for a while.

I voiced my objections, they firmly lifted me out of the pod, and away we went. I looked around as we were leaving as they said it was permitted of residents. I am unable to describe what I saw for lack of language to describe it. I wanted for a time after I got back to paint it but lack the talent to do so. Anyway, I was taken to a place where I could see my body through a black veil and was shoved feet first through the top of my head back into my body. When I opened my eyes I was inside my body, it was in pain, and the doctor and a nurse were asking me if I knew where I was. The doctor told me that I may have some broken ribs and a dislocated shoulder, among other things, and that I was on a balloon pump and it looked like I was going to recover some of my memories and functions damaged by oxygen deprivation. I looked down at my chest and it was discolored and swollen to resemble a football under the skin on the right side of my chest. I was uncomfortable to say the least; I tried to move my right arm and heard this awful loud scream. I looked around, I was back behind the veil, LOVE and TRUTH were there, and they asked why I was back so soon. Then they laid what looked like a chrome flashlight on my chest. It played a colorful tone, my chest went down, and they asked if there was anything else, I would like other than returning to my pod, as I like to call it. I said no and they told me it would be there waiting on me and then I was back. #127 

Tuesday, September 14, 2021

During NDE told "God appears in a familiar form."

I had been ill with a bad case of bronchitis for several weeks. It was hanging on and on. I was traveling from Indianapolis to Terre Haute one day, and I got so tired, I decided to pull off at the little town of Cloverdale to take a brief rest. It was very cold. I parked the car in an empty parking lot and turned off the engine. I covered myself up with my coat and reclined my seat, just to try to get a short nap. The time was 12:02 pm. I did not go to sleep. After a few minutes, I began to have difficulty breathing. I fumbled in my purse for my inhaler, took a couple of inspirations from it, then lay back down - but I still could not breathe. I tried to sit up, but I was too weak. I struggled and struggled for air but simply could not breathe in or out. I started to pass out, and I became aware of my body, as if I were looking at it from the outside. I wasn't seeing it with my eyes, I was just aware there was a body there, that was struggling for air, and it was getting weaker and weaker. Then the body became very quiet.

I knew the body was mine, but I didn't seem to care very much about it. Suddenly I found myself in a tunnel. The tunnel was made of some transparent kind of bricks or blocks. Light shone into the tunnel through the bricks. It was a beautiful golden light, and it felt warm and comforting. I wanted to get to the light. I stepped into the tunnel, and as I did, the tunnel began to slowly rotate. I told myself to be careful of my footing so I would not fall as the tunnel rotated. I walked a step or two before I saw a door at the end of the tunnel. It was a heavy, ornate, blue door. I had no sooner determined that I wanted to go up to the door, when suddenly, there I was. I tried to open it, but I couldn't. Then information just flowed into me. I was told that once the door was opened, I would be confronted with a choice. It was going to be a very difficult choice, so I should think carefully before making it.

I stood quietly before the door, pondering the information, when suddenly it opened. I looked out on a great expanse of darkness immediately below and in front of me. Beyond the darkness, in the distance, was an endless galaxy. A bright Light, brighter than all the stars in the galaxy, shone from the center. This Light felt as if it were pulling me toward it. Below me, in the expanse of darkness, I could hear human beings in distress. I could tell they were suffering. It sounded something like a busy emergency room, but the suffering was palpable. Somehow, I knew if they would just turn to that Light, their suffering would end, but they were stubborn and would not turn to the Light.

As I looked out at this most beautiful sight of stars, planets, and the great radiant and loving Light, I saw tiny trails of blue, pink and green lights traveling across the expanse of darkness toward the Great Light. I wondered what they were, and instantly I had the information that they were prayers from people seeking the Light. They were very beautiful, and once they reached the Light, they were absorbed into it. Then larger trails of white light traveled from the Great Light outward. I knew that these were answers to prayers. I just wanted to watch the traveling of the lights, be warmed by the Light and enjoy the beautiful view. The Light turned a magnificent blue and rolled toward me like an ocean wave. It was not really close to me, but nevertheless I could see the image of Jesus within the blue wave. Love poured out upon me, like warm water. Jesus looked just like he did on the poster in my Sunday School class. I had the thought that if I had been a Buddhist, perhaps he would look like Buddha, and I was told, 'That is right. God appears in a familiar form.' I wanted to ask Jesus some questions, but suddenly I was told I had to make a choice. I was not told by a person, it was more like a chorus of voices that were not heard with my ears, but somehow communicated another way. They told me I could stay or I could go back. I was to think carefully before making a decision.

I thought about my three teen-aged children at home. They were all troubled. We had all been abandoned by my husband the year before. We were dealing with poverty and abandonment, in addition to all the stresses of puberty. I was very tempted to stay with the Light (which was now changing color and turning back into its original form), but I knew I could not abandon my children to a mean world without a mother. I did not even get a chance to tell the chorus that I had to go back to my children. As soon as I knew that I could not abandon them, I felt as if I had been dropped from thirty feet in the air onto a concrete slab. I slammed into my body with the most crushing pain imaginable. I could feel the fluttering of a preliminary heartbeat. I heard my body try to inhale. I felt the very cold fingers and cheeks. This body was extremely cold, and still it could not move. I heard it inhale sharply and groan. I listened for it to inhale again, and it did. I coaxed it, telling it when to breathe in and when to breathe out. I felt its heart gain a rhythm, and then I was completely within the body, struggling for a good breath.

I have never been so cold. The outdoor temperature was about twenty degrees, and my body seemed nearly that cold. I looked at the clock. It was 12:40 pm. It took nearly an hour of heating the car and my body until I could move effectively. My breathing was very tenuous. Eventually I became strong enough to drive home. # 4964


Monday, September 13, 2021

Nurse experiences near-death experience

Intense pain, loud noise, swiftly extracted through the top of my head to the uppermost left-hand corner of the ceiling of the surgical suite. Awareness of self as being present while observing medical staff suddenly going into resuscitation mode-realizing I still existed and was not afraid (contrary to previous earthly experience of being young, single mom raising a three year old and questioning Meaning of existence). I thought, 'This must be who I really am' when I myself in that state and found that 'I' was an alive entity/being without a body (and saw that body on the table). I thought, 'They think I'm gone, but I'm really up here.' I was exhilarated, curious, and wanted to 'see where this would go'.

In all, I recall four various dimensions, and curiously don't recall the transitions (in choosing to re-experience this daily in a meditative/prayer state I want to recall the transitions but have not). Next, I was moving/flying through space (dark void) at an unbelievably swift speed aware eventually that I could control speed and direction with awareness. Became aware there were objects in that dark space (maybe like stars in the sky?) that were bright in comparison and was attracted to them. I had the sense of avoiding some and 'steering' toward others (good and bad?).

Then there was One star of incredible dimension, brightness, beauty, majesty. As I was drawn toward it (combined with earnest choice), I could see complex shapes and colors. (Words don't describe it – I have tried to draw it.) I could see dimensions where the colors and shapes were overlaid one on another (like translucent immense precious stones fitted together to form a complex multi - doesn't describe - dimensional impression of a Most Loving Being that drew me to Him, invited me in, and pointed the Way to the Light. ALL wisdom and love was conveyed via unheard thought transmission from that Being (Jesus?). That light was a yet far distant point that I immediately (in combination again of will and being drawn) directly myself to with all earnestness with the conscious goal of uniting with that light (or perish?). As I approached, the light grew larger, brighter, compelling until I was suddenly thrust into it (beyond a sense of boundary) with indescribable speed. That is the only transition that is recalled.

Now, in the light, for eternity (seemed like), experience a sense of being 'held,' immersed, fully bathed, buoyant, ONE WITH THE LIGHT! The light was a golden light, warmth, and embracing. A state of (words are inaccurate) ALL LOVE, peace, unity, Wisdom from God, at the center, and innumerable other, unseen others poured into me to teach and explain to me the immense divinity of His overall plan from the beginning of time to the future. I soaked in with the conscious preciousness of gratitude for the unique, yet ever present for all, experience of knowing the immensity of the glorious plan. I felt like a 'chosen tutoree' with a privilege to be present here. I understood, in that experience, why and how God had been present and ever will be. That the experience on Earth is like a stage for all the divine beings to observe, cajole, and minister to individuals on Earth as they choose what they will and direct their own selves toward God or away (inadequate, incomplete theology to explain).

At the same time, I could perceive, from their perspective also the literal view of Earth from there (Heaven?) and even move around the planet from many, various perspectives while still being There and continuing to receive transmission. Seemed like an eternity that I wanted to remain in, yet there was a 'direction' to comprehend and maintain what I was learning. Eventually, there was a sense of a need to return and participate in transmitting and sharing this experience.

Actually, that came in the next dimension (not recall transition) where I was standing in front of the most beautiful, exquisite, representation of the English cottage I always conceived in my mind since earliest memory in childhood of the perfect home. I was outside the gate (picket fence with curved arbor climbing with roses) - so real. The golden light was streaming from the windows in the late dusk. I knew God was in the house. (I can see all the details of the home) I wanted to go in to be with Him. As I put my hand on the handle to go in, I was told 'If you go in you cannot come out. You have a little son (then four years old) who needs you. The people on earth need to know all that you have witnessed and experience. That their experience is not the totality of existence, but a crucial part of the overall plan.' Could 'see', understand, that my fear was an obstacle to coming to know God and His presence, not only for me, but also for all. That was the overriding message, the root of all evil in this world, and the foci of their interest, message, to this world. Then, I experienced the reverse of the initial experience. I was moving from that wondrous state back in and through the top of my head.

I became aware that I had a sheet over my whole body and head, that I was no longer in the surgical suite, and knew that they thought I was dead. I knew that I had to move, with all effort, finally did, and saw the surprise on the anesthesiologist's face who was present with the nurse who I did not see. Later, when roused by the surgeon, he dramatically questioned, 'Where did you go, I thought I lost you?' The rest is history. I recovered, chose not to return to work, focused on my son, behaved in ways that were incongruent with previous experience that were motivated totally by this experience.
Viva Tapper, PhD and Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner (1954-2015)


Saturday, September 11, 2021

Experience in conversation with God

I felt myself getting out of my body. Once outside, I saw the hospital staff working around my body to revive it. I've been very surprised by my paranormal powers in this different form! First I had 360 degree vision, I could see above, below, on my right, on my left, behind, I could see EVERYWHERE at the same time!

Secondly, I could zoom on a particular point. I traveled at the speed of thought, I just needed to think about a place or somebody and I was instantly there! I could go through walls, I went through matter, and it was VERY EXCITING!

I heard people's thoughts. Even before they opened their mouth, I knew what they were about to say! Because I heard their thought! Besides, it was quite a cacophony in the room, but I just had to focus on one person and then, I just heard this person! 
Well, that's it for extraordinary powers you have when out of the body! I strolled about. I visited my mother at her home. I went into the deep universe. I climbed very high in space and the sight was WONDERFUL! At some point, I felt sucked away into a long dark tunnel at an incredible speed! At the tunnel end there was a glowing pinpoint. In this tunnel, there were other beings like myself, and we looked at each other saying, 'I believe we are dead!' The more I went forward, the more the light grew. I arrived into this light. 
The light was wonderful and very bright. But what hit me the most is that in this light I felt at peace, joy, but most of all I felt an incredible love! This light loved me! This light talked to me! I asked it if it was God and it answered me, 'Yes I am the light!' This light being (whom I did not see) knew EVERYTHING about me; he knew my life from beginning until end! Once in this light, I remembered who I was, I also got answers to all questions I ever wondered about, like who created the universe and how, how does the cosmos work, physics, etc. Oh yes, I did not learn it, I remembered it!

Being in this knowledge was a divine state. God then showed me all my life from birth until my NDE. I felt and experienced again all these events and I also felt emotions I had raised in others. I was my only judge! This experience was very painful. I dare not imagine what Adolf Hitler underwent when feeling the pain of millions of individuals. God showed me when I had generously done things without thinking about it beforehand, and when I had done unloving things. I even saw myself stealing sweets in a shop, thinking to myself, 'Whew, nobody saw me!' Indeed, somebody saw me. Yes, God saw me! But he does not judge me. In fact, this is what hit me the most. God does not judge, he just loves us with unconditional love, this love is indescribable, it is not like what we feel on earth, this is rather a force-of-love.

The light and I talked for quite a long time. Oh, yes! On the other side, communication is done via telepathy (thought transfer). I must tell you that God has a fantastic sense of humor; I never laughed so much in all my life! We laughed about the way I had so seriously reacted to an event. Life on earth is a big drama! It should not be taken too much in earnest! As for the universal knowledge I got, I was not allowed to come back with the answers, I remember I knew and I recall some little things like the fact we are eternal beings, we always existed and we shall always exist! Each time we incarnate, we lose memory of who we are.

Prior to the creation of the universe there was only us, united in just one small point of awareness. This consciousness had knowledge but we could not experience it. Then we separated into billions of individual consciousnesses, and we created the universe to go there and have fun! One day we shall all be reunited again, and again we shall 'explode' and everything shall start again, as this is an unending circle! True life, true reality is in the other world. I remember the light told me that there is more than one universe, there are billions of them, and earth is not the only planet we may choose to incarnate on.

I recall that when I was out of my body, I wondered what I looked like without a body. Then I looked at myself and I was light, I was made of light! However, at some point I had not this light body anymore, I was just a point of consciousness in the universe! At some point God told me, 'You must go back to earth.' I refused then; no way I should go back into that sick body. Then God showed me a vision of my mother who cried because I was dead, and then I came back. I went down through this tunnel much talked about, and I had to reenter my body through my head. The feeling was very unpleasant; it was like putting a diver suit too small on. Here it is! This was my NDE! #4046


Friday, September 10, 2021

In NDE meets friend who had died

I was asleep. Then I was floating above my body. I observed the shine on my hanging copper pot and the pretty colors of my quilt. I watched my body but I don't recall seeing mom in the room with me at that time. I floated up to the ceiling.

Lucy entered the room with the bright rays of sun through the window. She had no body, like me. We greeted each other happily and played, spinning and twirling in the air. It was fun.

When we stopped, she took me up through a dark tunnel with an intense light at the top. When we arrived, there was no top or bottom. There was nothing there but love. It was pure love. Intense love. Everything was okay. Everyone there was okay. They were all happy, loving beings. They were expecting Lucy. They talked with her and laughed with her. I watched them and felt the love all around me. They reviewed Lucy's past. Suddenly, I felt a being communicate, 'You're not supposed to be here.'

As I awoke, I felt pressure on my chest. I felt lips on mine. When I opened my eyes, mom was leaving the room with her pillow. I never slept with one for obvious reasons. I noticed that my arms were folded across my chest like a dead person. She seemed angry with me and said it was because I wouldn't wake up.

I told mom about the dream I had. She didn't think much of it until later that day when we got a call from Aunt Barbara telling us that Lucy had died that morning.

For years, I believed I had a psychic experience. I was wrong. It wasn't ESP. It was NDE. I was killed and then revived by my mother. It has taken most of my life for me to come to terms with what mom did to me and the rest of my family. We all suffered abuse from her. # 2948

Thursday, September 9, 2021

When falling asleep feels "tether holding my soul"

I was having oral surgery and had a reaction the medication to put me asleep. I was flat lined for over three minutes until the medical people showed up. I remember the whole event. I was with my deceased father in-law in an area that was so peaceful I didn't want to leave. When he died, he could not speak English, but when I was with him, I could understand him perfectly.

As they tried to revive me and get my heart started again I could feel them using the paddles to get my heart started. I could feel my body moving up and down, but knew I was not moving. I was laying there in darkness with my arms crossed and could feel my body moving.

Ever since that event I have this strange thing happen to me when I'm about to fall asleep. I can almost control my soul and have out of body experiences when I want to. Sometimes it feels like there is a tether holding my soul to my body and it snaps me back in. #20726

Tuesday, September 7, 2021

Free will and choices shape our lives

In April of 1995, I was a newly divorced mother of two boys, ages seven and two. I'd been working two jobs to support us, and fell ill with what I believed was the flu. Each day I worked, and each day I felt a greater weight on my chest. As I was only in Georgia for four years at this time, I had no family, only friends. Neighbors often rallied to my side with help in a crisis, I felt blessed. As I grew weaker, the Lynch family stopped by and offered to take my sons for the night, and would drop them at school/daycare the next day. Another neighbor was instructed by the Lynch's to check up on me the next morning. With my children cared for, I crawled into the bottom bunk of my sons' bed. Excruciating pain grew stronger across my chest and shoulders. In a fraction of a moment, everything around me melted away.

I was surrounded by a mass of solid glowing white. My eyes caught a girl to my right side. She was probably nineteen or twenty. Shorter than my five feet eight inches stature she starred up at me. She asked where we were. I had no clue. She proceeded to tell me she'd been driving home from work and didn't understand how she was now standing beside me. I revealed likewise, that I had been in my sons' bunk bed and had no recollection of moving.

In front of us, a man appeared and approached us. The best I can describe his face/features is brown curly hair to the nape of his neck, liquid brown eyes, capable of illuminating the most unbelievable compassion, and a delicate mustache under a pronounced nose. His face literally glowed. His eyes kept mine to his. I asked him where we were. He smiled, nodded, and said, 'The best way to describe this is, you are in a form of limbo.' My mind desperately tried to grasp what he was implying. Unfortunately, whenever I am stressed, excited, antsy etc. my bladder turns into a waterlogged tsetse fly. Embarrassed, I moved forward and asked where the restrooms were. This part is where I get emotional in repeating my NDE. This man simply smiled at me. Not a smirk. Not a condescending gesture. He smiled with every ounce of unconditional love and compassion that I will never properly explain. His smile covered my body like a blanket and made me feel so at peace. Asking me to move with him, I assumed he was taking me to the facilities.

Gesturing he told me to walk forward and I would see what I would call 'a mirror'. Once in front of it, I would understand why I didn't need a bathroom. Moving into the direction, before me was a liquid pool of white, yet, it also appeared to be a mirror. I was completely mesmerized. There were colors - brilliant colors everywhere. I was an array of beautiful moving, shimmering, vibrating, and colors. He came closer and said, 'Do you understand now?' I realized I was pure energy, spirit, and part of a flowing consciousness; while still remaining 'Denise'. At that moment, he shared his name, 'John'. As we moved, he also shared with me what was happening.

The following is a reiteration of his words. 'Everyone has choices. Everyone has free will. How this interacts in your life, and death, and with others, is all by choice. For instance, look at the girl who came here at the same time as you. If the ambulance driver takes a different road to the scene, if someone decides to move her and doesn't know what they are doing and cause more damage, if her internal organs are too crushed by the accident by speed and timing, she will stay here. You are laying in your sons' bedroom. Your one neighbor was given the responsibility to check on you. It is her choice, her free will. Will she find you? Will she decide to take a shower first and be too late? Each of us always hangs in a balance, by decisions, Not only by our own actions, but by the free will and actions of others.' He finished, 'I need to tell you, your neighbor is entering your home. She will find you. You will be going back.'

With these last words still ringing in my ears, I was sucked like a vacuum back into my body. My physical pain took my breath away. My neighbor was crying, pounding on my chest, and screaming for me to breathe. I was rushed to the hospital and diagnosed with pleurisy. My left lung muscle was so damaged the doctors informed me any future incidents with my lungs would kill me.

Jump ahead to 2003. On a trip with my mother and friend to Savannah Georgia, we decided to visit the Catholic Cathedral. Upon entering the church and looking around, a short elderly man, with twinkling grey eyes, came softly up to my right side. He took my hand and asked me to walk with him. I wasn't afraid or fearful (besides my mom and friend were directly in front of us). As they walked ahead and moved towards the altar, the little man guided me to the last stained-glass window on the left, closest to the alter. He asked if I saw anyone I knew in the stained glass. It was a side profile, but I recognized him immediately.

It was John, my John from my NDE. I whispered in awe, 'That's John.' 'Yes it is my dear. He was an apostle on earth and he was called smiling John. You needed to see this. You needed to remember and know that it happened.' I stood there shaking my head in a yes motion and turned to look at the little man. He was gone, nowhere in sight. My mother and her friend had turned to me and asked where he went. I told them I did not know - but I had a something to share with them. And I've been sharing my NDE with anyone who needs to hear it ever since.#5122 5122


Monday, September 6, 2021

Speaks to the Lord and his deceased father

I was not physically aware for three days as I was unconscious from the accident. I am told that I was dead on the operating room table for three minutes during the brain surgery I was having to correct life-threatening damage to my head.

During this time, I wasn't aware of what had become of my physical body until I awoke to the real world again.

I saw the light. I followed it. People say, 'Don't follow the light,' but you really don't have a choice. It's either follow the light, or be stuck there until you wake up - if you do. So I followed. I emerged somewhere outside the Gates of Heaven. I walked up to the nearest Seraph and didn't even get past stating my full name, when the Seraph simply smiled and said, 'Follow me, He wishes to speak with you.' So I did. We walked in through the gates and I was led straight to the chamber where The Lord sat. I seated myself across a desk from Him, and we began conversing. The desk was completely clear.

To this day, I cannot completely remember all that I talked with Him about - but I get a sense that it was a long conversation, one as if between friends. I do remember some parts of it, however - mainly that He told me directly that I would not remember much of what we talked about.

What I do remember is from the middle of the conversation. Keep in mind that at this point, I did not know my father had passed on in the accident that we had just been in. We had been on our way to go out to eat, as we always did, and he had been driving.

I remember that the Lord said to me, 'Worry not, you will not be kept here. I do not wish to have you home yet, for you have much to live for!' This was in response to my question, 'Am I really 'dead' to my life down there?' The Lord then smiled and my dad walked in, grinning as he went to stand by the Lord's side. It was his usual mischievous 'surprise bearing' smile. It also had a large amount of pride in it.

My dad simply said, 'I'm home.' To which I replied, 'Daniel will miss you, and so will I.' Daniel, who was seventeen at the time of the accident, is my younger brother. My dad simply said, 'Take care of him while you still can.' I said that of course I would.

The Lord then spoke and said, 'Your father spoke to me earlier and did not wish you to die. I granted his wish.' I conversed more with the Lord and my father. This portion isn't something I can remember, but I get the hazy sense that it was just as if we were talking things over, and that they were both consoling me.

My memory picks back up at the point where I expressed my anxiety at returning to life. I think I said, 'Well, I'd like to get back down and check on Daniel.' and I gave my father and the Lord a parting hug. I still remember the hugs well, for when I gave the Lord a hug, he whispered into my ear as I was transported back, 'You will not remember everything we spoke about, but don't worry, and you'll remember what you need to know in life when the time is right. And you will remember it all when you cross Heaven's threshold once again.' #5251

Sunday, September 5, 2021

Deceased grandfather persuades her to return

About an hour or two after I took some medications I knew something was not right. I now believe that an interaction between the medications was the problem. I felt like I was losing touch with reality in a way. I lay in bed and closed my eyes as I tried to get to sleep, and wished I would just feel better.

Now is the part where it gets hard to describe. It's as if my awareness started expanding out of my body. I was still in my body but out of it at the same time. It's a feeling that's impossible to describe without experiencing it yourself. I was in a deep void of empty space. Suddenly a cold, stiff feeling poured over my body. My awareness kept expanding, but my body felt like a cold machine that was holding me back. It felt like my respirations were artificial, and at that moment I just stopped breathing. I heard, rather than felt, my lungs gasp for air, but I was so disconnected from my body by now that there was no possible way to keep breathing. I have no idea how long I stopped breathing for, but my heartbeat got louder and louder until it stopped along with my breathing.

The moment my heart stopped the void became deeper and deeper, until it felt like it expanded forever. I sensed that the darkness was about to part and reveal a marvelous light. Then I felt the presence of my deceased grandfather. I don't remember everything that was said, but basically it was revealed that I could move on if I wanted to, but once I reached the light I would not be able to return to my body. He did not want my life to end though, because I still had some important lessons to be learned in this lifetime. He said that after I learned what I needed to about love that it would be my time to go.

I have a chronic illness, and this last year I have narrowly avoided death five times. My illness almost claimed me three times; I was also crossing the street when I felt an unseen force push me backwards out of the path of an oncoming car, and last of all I nearly fell off a cliff. He said that it was no accident that my life I had been spared each one of those times, and what I needed to learn in this life is so vital that I really needed to go back. I felt a force pushing me back into my body, and I resumed breathing.

I tried to get out of bed, but still felt so disconnected with my body in a way that I could barely move. I have no idea how long this continued, but as I lay there motionless, I felt at times my body would start getting cold, and my awareness would start trying to expand outside my body again - only to be pushed back by an unseen force. At one moment during this time, I felt the presence of two other deceased spirits. One was more prominent than the other was. I received the knowledge from him that they were two young men in this lifetime who had recently passed on from a tragic car accident. I received other details such as his name, the location, and the circumstances revolving around the accident. He told me the same thing as my grandfather as far as the fact that I still had things to learn in this life. During this entire experience, I also felt the presence of my 'Higher Self'. I can't really put this part into words, except to say that I have felt connected to this same Higher Self during different times in my life when I have felt truly been loving and connecting with others.

The next thing I remember is waking up several hours later. I suffered no ill effects, except a horrible headache and temporary short-term memory loss, which I suspect may have been a result from the oxygen deprivation rather than the medications themselves. Needless to say, I was kind of in a daze the entire next day.

At first, I thought I just wanted to move on, but later I went on the internet and started looking up car accidents in the news. After just a few minutes of searching, I saw a picture of a young man who had recently died in a car crash with his friend. I felt chills go up and down my spine because his name, the location and circumstances around the accident, and his picture all corresponded with exactly what was revealed to me the previous night. I never met him in this life, but I feel like there is some deeper meaning to why he was there. I have continued to feel his presence after my experience, and feel like maybe he has become kind of like a spirit guide. This experience has deeply affected me and has made me even more determined to continue to manage my illness and live the rest of life to the very fullest., 5288

Saturday, September 4, 2021

Deceased relatives assisted her surgery

After my hysterectomy surgery, I was discharged from the hospital to home. However, six days later, I was back in the hospital again because of severe pain and a high fever. The admission exam revealed that my blood was infected and that I had peritonitis. A scan showed I had internal bleeding in two places. The infection rate had gone way up to 327CRP. [CRP is the measure of a pain-reactive protein in the blood that rises with inflammation.] The pain was incredible. I needed emergency surgery to drain and wash the infected areas inside my abdomen. Fifteen minutes before I was taken to the operating theater, I was lying in my hospital bed feeling overwhelmed with pain.

Suddenly my awareness changed and the room became filled with a bright light. There before me were my late grandmother and late mother-in-law floating toward me! They came to rest on either side of my bed. My grandmother was to the left of me and my mother-in-law to my right. Only my mother-in-law spoke. She said it wasn't my time to come with them but that they were here to help me with my pain. So, they 'pulled' me out of my body and I floated straight upward a short distance where I stopped and remained hovering there. As soon as I left my body, everything was tranquil and I felt no more pain.

My mother-in-law pointed to a whitish translucent cord attached at one end to the floating 'me', and at the other end to my body on the bed. She instructed me to be careful not to break that cord as I was going to need it to get back into my body. From above, I could clearly see my husband and the doctors and nurses gathered around my bed. The room was filled with a beautiful bright white light. Looking through this white light, I could see vivid colors, as well as the ordinary objects in the room. I remained floating serenely above my body until I was taken to the operating theater. Once there, my mother-in-law and grandmother vanished.

In their place, beside my bed, appeared my late grandfather clad in a white coat. He had been a general practitioner/doctor during his life. However, I had never met him as he had died when I was seven years old! He spoke to me about the details of my medical issues and pointed out, in terms of centimeters, exactly where in my abdomen the three main internal infections were located. He specified this medical information in Latin. I don't speak Latin but I understood him. Then he too disappeared. I immediately re-entered my body and so I was able to repeat everything my grandfather had just told me while the surgeon wrote down detailed notes and my husband listened.

A couple of days after the (successful) surgery, I talked with the surgeon. He said he had never spoken to anyone in my condition, (CRP327 – i.e. in such a lot of pain), who had been able to talk so clearly. He had never had access before to a surgery with such accurate information on where to find the main infected areas. He said that my grandfather's directions had told him to move certain internal organs aside to get to the third infected location. Without my grandfather's information, he could easily have missed it, especially since, at admission, they had diagnosed me with only two internal infections, not three. It was exactly as my grandfather had described it. He had said that there was an area of infected fluid in a 'hidden' part of my pelvis and had described, in terms of centimeters, exactly where to drain this infected fluid. It was beneath a bleeding point., #5426

Gödel's reasons for an afterlife

Alexander T. Englert, “We'll meet again,” Aeon , Jan 2, 2024,