I was dozing off for some time. When suddenly, I was startled because I was literally ejected out of my body. I was wide awake and floating above my body. It looked so unfamiliar from a bird's eye view. I left the room and the house. The journey stopped in endless space. Gradually, I became aware of the presence of spiritual beings, but didn't pay them any attention. 'Seeing' was a pleasurable experience because everything was seen and perceived through consciousness. Perception and understanding was amazing; happening immediately. I marveled at how slow is the mind in comparison to this.
At first, there was a slow forward motion. But I didn't know why I was moving or where I was going. Suddenly, the destination of the journey seemed to be clear. Then, the forward speed increased like going into hyperdrive. I was rushing through worlds at amazing speed. The only thing I perceived was the alternating of the different colors and light intensities. With this, I always was floating about half a meter above the ground. I didn't feel any resistance at all; no friction due to the velocity.
Finally, I reached the destination. Around me it was pitch-dark. I perceived the presence of many beings. They gave me the impression of being slow and especially dull. They didn't speak together. They even seemed not to notice the darkness because they were so much involved with themselves. I was thinking, 'Here, I'm at the wrong place. I don't feel well here!'
Even though it was pitch-dark I could see distinctly that I was standing on the shore of a lake. I didn't have the time to think about my condition because I could see a boat far away. Standing upright in the boat, there was a man holding a lantern and he was looking towards us. I immediately knew him. It was Jesus! No wonder he was the only light to be seen far and wide. But I didn't care about him. I was completely lethargic about him. Finally he came ashore and stayed about an arm's length away from me. He looked at me with indescribably shiny, loving eyes and gave me a hug. I was immediately surrounded in brightness. Immediately, all my worries and burdens fell away from me. It was simply wonderful being bathed in bliss and love! Suddenly, I was filled with a confidence that I never knew before. It was like I was a different person. It was immediately clear to me, that only my own thinking had been limiting my potential. He was 'talking to me in my mind' and told me two things about my future; that I would find my spiritual master and reach the goal of spiritual effort otherwise known as 'self-fulfillment.'
How I came back to my body, I don't know. I had been in a coma for three days at home, and later on at the intensive care station. What I remember next, is looking for my room in the psychiatric ward. I couldn't remember my room number and all the doors looked the same.
In the same week when I was back home, a working friend told me that she wanted to reduce her private library and asked me if I may have any interest in a book of Ramana Maharshi, an Indian mystic. I had never heard of him, but I remembered Jesus' words that I would find my spiritual teacher. The book captivated me from the beginning and it became my life's compass. Twenty years later,the second declaration of Jesus came true. How terrible would it have been if my suicide had been successful and I would have seen how my life could blossom. I had no idea that it could change in a way that I never could have dreamed of.
NDERF.org #8950
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