Paul's video recalling ELDVs: Kerr excerpt #10

Dr. Christopher Kerr writes of dying patients having dreams of renewing friendships with deceased friends and relatives:

Paul’s End-of-Life Dreams and Visions experiences capture many of the common features of ELDVs reported in our studies. This video was taken 3 weeks before his death and includes commentary from his daughter Dianne (Link to Paul Interview Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88fJDXZ7sg4). Paul’s ELDVs were rich in detail and easily recalled. 

In Paul's ELDV, his most recurring dream was that of Joyce waving at him in her favorite light blue dress. He described how she’d given him ‘the little beauty pageant wave” to let him know that she was fine, and that he’d be fine, too. Very little was said between Paul and his wife, yet he felt her presence, her smile, and her beauty. Paul also had ELDVs that involved packing. The theme of traveling or preparing to go is evident in over 39% of our dying patients. We have also noted in our studies that patients often relive past traumatic events such as war. Paul was a veteran whose ELDV also included returning to his Basic Training days from which he awoke to comment “I don’t want to do this again”.

Paul enjoyed sharing his experiences, while his daughter Diane, a nurse, was in turn heartened to see him talk about his end-of-life dreams and “get a lot out of it... He chose to remember the positive dreams that he had so we all enjoyed always hearing about dad’s dreams... I could always take my cues from dad. If dad was comforted by those dreams, that is what I was looking for... My father’s last few days on earth were the last gift that he gave us as a father. Because of circumstances from the past, as soon as dad had a stroke four and a half days before he died, everybody raced to be there. Two of my brothers were not able to be with us when my mother had died and it was important to all [seven] of us to be there. 

"We spent four days in our childhood home, cooking for each other, taking care of dad, visiting with dad, priests came and went, family members, friends and neighbors came and went, and we were given the greatest gift to know that we were all going to be together, that dad might not be there but he brought us all together one more time and we took that with us, that was a tremendous gift he gave us... He couldn’t speak but he could smile and the light was in his eyes... he was there with us until the last couple of hours before he died.” 

Where do their minds and hearts drift when we can no longer speak and have closed our eyes? Paul’s pre-death experiences helped answer these questions and fears: he was returned to love. 

Christopher Kerr, “Experiences of the Dying: Evidence of Survival of Human Consciousness,” an essay written for the 2021 Bigelow Institute for Consciousness Studies in response to the question: “What is the best evidence for survival of consciousness after bodily death?” Dr. Kerr, MD, PhD, is the Chief Medical Officer and Chief Executive Officer for Hospice & Palliative Care Buffalo. The full text with notes is available at https://bigelowinstitute.org/contest_winners3.php.