"It was as if my spirit had returned."

I have a memory/vision of viewing my unconscious crumpled body on the ground from ~15-20 feet above. I recall no sound; I was just floating above observing the scene. Everything was very still and silent. No one else was present, not my friend, our horses, or the helicopter and EMTs who came to get me. It was just me in my jeans and pink shirt, laying on my left side crumbled and unconscious. A second memory, later in the day I suspect, of observing myself from above on a gurney in a hospital hallway with warm golden or orange lights or walls near a nursing station and later in CT. I’m sure plenty of people were there but I saw none other than my lifeless body. Both memories are very quiet and serene, I was just floating and observing. It was sad, frightening and peaceful. I was just watching myself or, my body, so still and lifeless. It was if I was given a choice or pondering as to whether to return or move on. Or just put there to observe myself.

I was in a coma for 10 days and woke to hearing loss and brain troubles. My life which had been at its peak, finally, just before the accident crumbled and I became withdrawn, angry, erratic and struggled in school, with self-esteem and in friendships. I went from being voted 'friendlies' and 'cutest couple' in my senior class to becoming a social pariah. I struggled with anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem since then.

25 years later (a year ago now), 6 months into recognizing and working on my PTSD and exactly 25 years after the accident, on a beautiful walk in my current state of Massachusetts I found myself on a beautiful street with lovely little old (at least 100 years) houses near my home that I’d never seen before. I felt so comforted and cozy there, as if I was meant to be or live there. The feeling was so comforting and spiritual, unlike anything I’d even felt. Then, a few minutes later on another more familiar street, I felt a sudden rush of joy and exhilaration hit my chest. It was if my spirit had returned. I suddenly felt strong, confident, and happy as my 17-year-old self had felt prior to the accident and all the turmoil it has caused in my life.

Maybe a few weeks or days after that walk, on another walk in a nearby beautiful cemetery on a cloudy afternoon, a sudden spot of focal golden light on a gravestone caught my eye. I retraced my steps and the grave, ~100 years old and one I’d never seen before, was that of a woman with my same name and last initial, Carrie B. She had died young; I think in her 20’s or 30’s. As I retraced my steps to confirm what I’d seen, ravens in the trees above started cawing and rustling leaves and I realized that was identical to the fall day in Missouri exactly 25 years ago when ravens spooked my horse on the trail minutes (seconds?) before my accident. I got the same feeling with being connected to my true self/ spirit as i had the week before on my walk. My whole body was humming, thrilled and comforted. I could not look away.

Can a spirit leave the body and not fully return for 25 years? Since then, I have felt more myself (unlike I’ve felt in 25 years) and the circumstances of my life (I’m finally engaged in living and pursuing my dreams again) have improved immensely.  

NDERF.org 9307

In coma after fall through iced river but revives

My grandfather owned an old inn on the Ottawa River. My mother was 5 months pregnant at the time and sent me and my 4-year-old brother out to play in the snow. It was March and the snow was starting to melt but the river was still frozen over. She told us not to go down to the river. It's a very big yard so there was plenty of room to play and I believe she believed that we would listen to her. However, we saw the sailboats on the river and wanted to go look at them. So, we went to the river.

I stepped on the ice first and then my brother stepped on the ice. Then the ice cracked and he got up on the bank but I went under the water. My brother screamed that I was in the river and my mom ran down but couldn't see me. So, she ran back and screamed up the stairs to wake her youngest brother to help and he came running down to the river. He saw my snowsuit and pulled me out of the water, laid me on the snow bank and tried to give me mouth to mouth. He eventually said I was gone but my mother insisted that I couldn't be. The ambulance came and took me to the hospital where I was in a coma and given a blood transfusion.

I didn't have any recollection of the actual event. I only learned of it when I saw the scar on my ankle from the blood transfusion. I always had the sense that I was different and that people weren't being their true selves. I always felt the need to help others and was drawn to religion and dreamed of being a nun when I was young. One of the strongest guiding principles was that I felt a strong desire to do something that would help greater humanity.

There was always a lingering memory or presence of a memory that stayed with me but I was only able to describe it years later because I didn't attribute it to being near death because I didn't know that I had almost died. So, once the understanding of what happened to me became clearer the memory became clearer as well.

I was not in my body but somewhere else. In a space that I can only describe as Heaven. Heaven was almost like being in the clouds but I wouldn't say it is this realm. It is another realm. There are not trees or earthly things, just space and it was sort of mystical. I was aware of the presence of someone with me. However, I couldn't see this person. Yet, he was all around me like surround sound and he could speak to me with his mind. We communicated telepathically. He showed me how wonderful life was and to not be afraid. Life is a miracle. He instilled in me an everlasting excitement for life and also gave me an understanding of how I can help others by sharing this excitement. This is all I remember.

Of course, it wasn't my time otherwise I wouldn't be here today. The doctors said it was the ice that saved me by slowing my heart rate down. It is a miracle that I'm alive as I'm sure I was under for a period of time that one normally wouldn't survive given how long it took between falling in the water and getting to the hospital. I'm so grateful to be alive and I try to share the excitement that I felt during my NDE with as many people as I can even if it's just through smiling and showing love. 

NDERF.org #9311

Attempted suicide led to a new sense of purpose

My friend left my room and went outside with her boyfriend. I went to their room so I’d be found. My dog Alice was with me. I drew up a heavy shot of heroine. Then, I sat with my legs crossed and tucked under each other. I was in the middle of the floor. I took the shot. I attempt to get up, but couldn't. I had fallen face down.

I remember what I felt like. I was waking up out of the sleep of a lifetime and into a pool of the most overwhelming emotion of peace, serenity, and love. As I opened my eyes and sat up, I could see between the human world and another amazing place. When I stood up, my vision or view focused on this new, wonderful place. I was met by a group of people. I knew all of them; they were former family members and a few friends. There were also a few I didn't know; one female and one male. The ground felt like I was floating midair above it. If I could feel it, I would liken it to silken grass but it was multi-colored. There were no trees. Yet there was a clear, golden-yellow sky like an early morning sun that goes into mid-morning. My family began to tell me it was time to go back. I argued with them. Then in what felt like the snap of a finger, I was back in my body and really sitting up. There was a tube going down my nose and someone just finishing cutting my shirt to place the electric shock pads on my body. 

At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes.  I tried and killed myself with drugs. 

Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Time seemed to go faster or slower than usual What’s seemed like 6 hours was way less. 

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm. It wasn’t a field I was in even though it seemed as one. Then when my family, friends, and the field disappeared, I was with the two strangers the bright light behind them.

What emotions did you feel during the experience? Overwhelming feelings of peace, love, understanding, knowing without fear.  

Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? Yes. It confirmed there is something bigger than ourselves and bigger than this little pointless earthly life, that might actually have a greater purpose for our next stop.  

How accurately do you remember the experience in comparison to other life events that occurred around the time of the experience? I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience.

NDERF.org # 9310

O God, our help in ages past

O God, our help in ages past, 

Our hope for years to come,
Our shelter from the stormy blast,
And our eternal home.

Before the hills in order stood,
Or earth received her frame,
From everlasting Thou art God,
To endless years the same.

A thousand ages in Thy sight
Are like an evening gone;
Short as the watch that ends the night
Before the rising sun.

O God, our help in ages past,
Our hope for years to come,
Be Thou our guard while troubles last,
And our eternal home.

 

Words by Isaac Watts, pub. 1719; St. Anne hymn tune

Sung at the Westmister Abbey in 2011 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rsHIwXTjAOU

NDE after giving birth: "I felt like God was there."

I was almost 19 years old and had just given birth to my first child a couple of hours before my experience. I recall I had the urge to use the restroom, and I attempted to get up from my bed without assistance. My mother and younger sister were in the room and holding the baby. When I stood up and felt an immense rush, like my water had broken, but it was blood. I saw the blood on the floor, and remember thinking, 'That's not right.'

The next thing I recall is feeling warm. I couldn't see anything but darkness. I didn't feel afraid. It was almost comfortable and cozy, like a warm hug. I couldn't hear anything. But just before I went into the darkness, I heard what I think was a nurse yelling for a crash cart.

I'm not sure how long I was in this dark and comfortable state of void, and I don't recall any events immediately after. I do remember waking up in my hospital bed, and my mother looked scared and was doting over me. Later on, over the years, she has told me she thought she had lost me forever. I don't fear dying and always remember how comforting that experience was. I knew I was okay; I didn't have a fear at all. The dark wasn't cold or scary. I have always been afraid of the dark but this wasn't that kind of dark. Following this experience, I began my journey to become a Registered Nurse and have been since the age of 23.  

Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm. I was in a place without stress, without fears. It was a darkness but I knew I was with love. It was void of anything, no sounds no lights, nobody, but it was full of love and comfort.

During your experience, did you gain information about the existence of God? Yes I felt like God was there. Surrounding me, I felt love and peace.  

 

NDERF.org, #9319

During NDE friend says his death wasn't my fault

I experienced a bad accident a couple months ago. I was knocked out for 24 hours and I don't remember what really happened before my accident.

But what I vividly remember, to this day, was going through a tunnel. I was out of my body. I could see myself lying there on the bed. Then when I came out of the tunnel at the other end was seeing my friend, standing on the mountain. I didn't recognize him from the back. I thought it looked like Trey, my best friend who was like a brother to me. He had passed over when I was 21.

I called out to him saying, 'Ray is that you standing there?'

He turned around to face me as he answered, 'Yes.'

I said, 'Ask them why am I here? What am I doing here? Am I dead?'

He said, 'No you're not dead; just somewhere else in a different reality.'

I asked him, 'What do you mean?'

He wouldn't answer me, only saying, 'I have something to tell you and that was whatever you do don't blame yourself for my death. It it wasn't your fault. It was my fault.'

I think I needed that validation because ever since that day of his tragic death, I was supposed to be with him that night, and I wasn't there for him. I felt that it should have been me that night who died and not him. 

Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Yes I went through a tunnel that was bright, white light.  

Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes My best friend who had died 10 years prior.

Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? An unusually bright light.

Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world.

NDERF.org #9312

Twelve lines of NDE evidence: Long excerpt #25

Radiation oncologist Jeremy Long writes in his article, "Evidence for Survival of Consciousness in Near-Death Experiences: Decades of Science and New Insights" - "Twelve lines of evidence for the reality of survival of human consciousness after death have been presented in this article. This evidence consistently demonstrates that near-death experiences are medically inexplicable and cannot be explained by physical brain function.

"The evidence presented would be extraordinary even if near-death experiencers were fully awake when they had their experiences. But they’re not. NDEs happen at a time of unconsciousness or clinical death with an absent heartbeat. Conscious and lucid experiences while unconscious should not occur. Yet NDEs do occur and are packed with multiple lines of evidence consistently pointing to an afterlife. To review, these are the twelve lines of evidence presented in this article for the reality of NDEs and an afterlife:

1. Consciousness and alertness during near-death experiences is usually greater than during their everyday life. This is medically inexplicable given that NDEs occur when they are unconscious or clinically dead.

2. What near-death experiencers see and hear while they are out-of-body during near- death experiences is almost always completely accurate. Out-of-body observations far from their physical body are also nearly always totally realistic. Nearly all out-of-body observations are confirmed to be accurate when later checked by the NDErs or others.

3. Supernormal sensory awareness is consistently described in near-death experiences. Normal or supernormal vision may occur in those born totally blind and in those with severe vision impairment.

4. Typical near-death experiences occur while under general anesthesia at a time that conscious and lucid experiences should not be possible.

5. When deceased loved ones are encountered in near-death experiences, they are virtually always deceased at the time of the NDEs and almost always appear in perfect health.

6. The core content of near-death experiences from all around the world is remarkably consistent. NDEs from non-Western countries are remarkably similar to Western NDEs.

7. The core content of near-death experiences in children, including very young children, are strikingly similar to the NDEs of older children and adults.

8. Life reviews in near-death experiences typically have an unearthly acceleration of consciousness. They include real events that previously occurred in the NDErs’ lives, even if the events were long forgotten.

9. Near-death experiencers commonly have substantial changes in their beliefs and values as aftereffects following their NDEs. NDErs usually develop a greatly increased belief in an afterlife and decreased fear of death.

10. Near-death experiencers generally accept the reality of their NDEs. The NDERF survey found that 93.8% of NDErs believed that their experiences were definitely real.

11. Shared near-death experiences occur when two or more people have a life- threatening event simultaneously, with at least one person surviving and the other(s) permanently dying. The surviving NDEr later describes a shared experience with the permanently deceased person(s). This is significant evidence that what is described in NDEs is the initial journey of the irrevocably deceased into the afterlife.

12. The remarkably consistent spiritual content of near-death experiences is further evidence for the reality of NDEs. In describing the profoundly blissful afterlife, NDErs are consistently aware of the vital importance of love, the reality of God that transcends human understanding, and the unity of all of us.

"The strength of this evidence convinces me that near-death experiences are real and there absolutely is an afterlife. I encourage each reader to consider the evidence for the reality of NDEs and the afterlife and reach your own conclusion. The convergence of multiple lines of evidence for the validity of NDE and an afterlife presented in this article builds a far stronger case than from only a single line of evidence. To illustrate this, suppose there existed only two lines of evidence for the reality of an afterlife. Neither line of evidence may be 100 percent convincing but assume each line of evidence is individually 90 percent convincing. When combined, the two lines of evidence are mathematically calculated to be 99 percent convincing of the reality of an afterlife.
 

"Given the complexity of mathematically analyzing just two lines of evidence, it would be far more difficult to mathematically analyze all twelve lines of evidence presented in this article. Fortunately, the NDERF website has a custom-designed form that automatically performs this mathematical analysis for you (www.nderf.org/afterlife). This form allows you to calculate how strongly you believe that an afterlife is proven by the twelve lines of evidence in this article. This form also shows you the results of all others who completed the form.

"The NDERF studies presented throughout this article are the most extensive scientific investigation of near-death experiences ever reported. These investigations provide new and exceptional scientific evidence for the reality of NDEs and the afterlife. Most of the lines of evidence presented in this article are corroborated by the findings of prior scholarly near-death experience studies spanning over forty-five years. These previous investigations reinforce the remarkable results from the NDERF studies. I believe the evidence is now so strong that the survival of human consciousness after death is proven beyond a reasonable doubt.

"There is still much that we can learn from the scientific study of near-death experiences. Further scholarly investigation of NDEs and other experiences that suggest the survival of consciousness after bodily death is strongly encouraged.

"Skeptic arguments cannot explain the remarkable consistency of the content of near-death experiences. Physical brain function cannot explain NDEs. An essential part of convincing the world that NDEs and their evidence of an afterlife is real is to address the skeptical arguments. To accomplish this, a section of the NDERF website explores skeptical views in depth. Those interested in particular skeptical arguments not addressed in this article will likely find them discussed and refuted in this NDERF website section.

"Near-death experiences have profound implications for science. NDEs conclusively show that human experiences suggesting an afterlife can and should be scientifically investigated. NDEs provide compelling evidence that there is far more to consciousness than is explained by our physical brain.

"Near-death experiences also have important implications for religion. The great religions have always addressed a belief in an afterlife and God. The evidence from NDEs offers compelling evidence for the reality of an afterlife. Additionally, NDEs consistently point to a universe imbued with a vast and loving intelligence.

"NDEs show that death is not the end but rather a transition to a magnificent afterlife. This is a profoundly inspirational message for us, our loved ones, and all of humanity."

Jeffrey Long, MD, "Evidence for Survival of Consciousness in Near-Death Experiences: Decades of Science and New Insights." In the next several posts I will share excerpts from Long's 2021 article. Footnotes have been deleted. The complete text is available as a pdf at https://www.nderf.org